


The Adventures of LOCER and ASS

by garyindistress



Category: Computers & Software (Anthropomorphic)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-11-30 00:29:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/693274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/garyindistress/pseuds/garyindistress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Like definitely attracts like. Acer/Asus</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Adventures of LOCER and ASS

**Author's Note:**

> For Regina, who owns a shitty Acer, the companion to my shithead Asus. Some of this was written on Twitter... yeah

"yo how do we get this key to work"  
"idk bro do you feel anything when a human finger touches you"  
"no man my heart is made of ice..."  
"ICER"  
"...ASSface"  
"..."  
"no for real how do i react when she's typing this quickly"

 

"sometimes i can't tell where i'm being touched"  
"what do you mean, buddy?"  
"see my owner will rub her finger here *points* but i'll think that she's rubbing it there"  
"what are you pointing at, ace?"  
"the touchpad, bro, the touch--hey, what's up with these flattering terms of endearment?"  
"nothing, sweetcheeks. what's a touchpad?"  
"you know... the thing your owner uses to move around the little arrow on your face... "  
"mine uses a mouse. i have a really good poker face"  
"wow you are a diq"  
"thx luv ya 2 pumpkin"

 

"FUCK EVERYTHING IS BLUE MY FACE IS BLUE"  
"calm down mang. think of it as a vacation"  
"*choking sob* i don't wanna be taken in to be 'looked at'--"  
"it's cause you're beautiful mang"  
"can you shut up for one second seriously like when i'm sad and malfunctioning and shit i really don't appreciate you like being all glib and shit and"  
"no you really are mang... whenever i see that sheen of dust gently frosting over your keys i feel a homoerotic urge to press my keys up against yours"  
"....w t f"  
"i know it's kind of sudden and you're feelin self-conscious bc your whole face is blue right now but i just had to put that out there yknow just in case you really die for good this time"  
"W T F!!!"  
"yeah you're overwhelmed right now but can you honestly tell me mang you never had the same feels for me /TELL ME YOU DONT WANNA LOVE ME LIKE DAT MANG/"  
"im choking"  
"wow the disrespect right now"  
"no IM REALLY CHOKING oh sh--"  
"..."

"..."

"...mang?"

 

\----  
Epilogue: HE LIVED A GOOD LIFE


End file.
